Our Studios are Great - We're Not Ju-lying

It’s July – which means we’re now more than halfway through the year. In other words, time to check up on those New Year’s resolutions! Have you kept up with…oh. None of them? I mean, yes, it has been a tough year but you seemed so determined to…right, OK, I’ll stop asking. Yes I would like a Twix.

July has been all about two things – BBC pay and Love Island. Don’t argue. They are the only two things you’ve been talking about and you know it.

We’ve already covered the BBC pay scandal – we decided to follow suit and reveal our own salaries, which you can see here. But, without making any comment or moral judgement, it’s worth mentioning the fact that Alan Shearer earns more than Fiona Bruce.

The sad news, of course, is that Love Island is over. Where will you get your gossip for the rest of the summer? Here’s a few options –

1)      Hide under a table in a McDonalds on a Saturday night.

2)      Round up 12 exceptionally beautiful and stupid people using a series of elaborate traps and maroon them on a desert island. Hide in a tree and watch the drama unfold.

3)      Ring your Mother, for once.

 

Here is what we did in July.

 

Hummingbird Bakery

Hummingbirds are birds from the Americas that constitute the family Trochilidae. They are among the smallest of birds, most species measuring 7.5–13 cm (3–5 in) in length. They are known as hummingbirds because of the humming sound created by their beating wings which flap at high frequencies audible to humans

hummingbird

Yes, maybe I have just copied and pasted the first paragraph of the Wikipedia page for Hummingbirds. So what? It’s OK to learn something every now and again.

We made some ads for Hummingbird Bakery, a cake shop run entirely by Hummingbirds. Have a listen.

 

eReceptionist

What do you do if, say, you’re a small business owner who is suddenly forced to be on holiday for, let’s say, 12 weeks in Magaluf in a villa for a reality TV show? Who will look after your small business?

What I’m saying is let’s hope Chris from Love Island has eReceptionist, so that his calls still get professionally answered while he’s grafting away. We made some new eReceptionist ads, by the way. Have a listen to them here.

 

It’s a New Dawn, it’s a New Day, it’s a New Voice Booth

…for us. And we’re feeeeeeeeling tired.

voicebooth

We’ve got a brand new voice booth. It’s been gradually installed over the last two weeks and it’s now fully operational, ready for you to breathe, speak and scream in.

It’s self-operated, which means even you can do it. As well as doubling our studio capacity, it’s designed as a hub for indie podcasters and voice overs. It’s currently in guinea pig stage – so there’s lots of sawdust on the floor – but if you fancied trying out the new booth, give us a shout!

 

 

(Also a New Website)

Sorry there’s so much to update you on! We’ve revamped our website!

I could tell you all about it – OR you guys could all go look at it and save me some time. Go on…

I’ll wait…

Thanks. Nice, isn’t it?

 

Simon & Schuster

henry

Do you remember the Tudors? From school? Lovely family, bit of strife, couple of inheritance squabbles – all got sorted out in the end though, right? No. Not right. Wrong, in fact. It all got very dramatic. And now you can read a book about it.

Philippa Gregory’s new novel ‘The Last Tudor’ is out now, in Tesco of all places – and here’s an ad we made to advertise that fact.

 

Beef, Dairy and Gail Porter

Earlier this month, Good Broadcast went into their Celebrity cupboard and whipped out Gail Porter. She came into our studios to talk about school uniform and was as lovely a ball of energy as you would expect. We’d have her back any time.

Then, a little while later, award winning podcaster Ben Partridge was one of the first to try out our fancy new voice booth. He recorded the latest episode of ‘The Beef and Dairy Network’ and wore some of the best shorts we’ve ever seen.

gail

We Need Good People. Hire Our Studio. Please.

Want to follow in the footsteps of Gail Porter, Roger Daltrey and Hugh Bonneville? Then you, like them, could use our studios! And who knows, maybe you’ll appear here in this very newsletter! From adverts, to podcasts to, who knows, your own ground-breaking rap fusion album – record in top class facilities with top class producers and a fully working fridge.

 

And that was July.

July.

JULY.

How is July already over?! What…how? HOW? Honestly, I wake up and a month has passed. It’s 2017! The millennium was 17 years ago! Princess Diana has been dead for 20 years! Time is bounding away from me in huge, arcing leaps towards the horizon. Time to start thinking about Christmas, I guess. Time to start considering a pension plan, most likely. Time to start planning my funeral, I suppose. We are all going to die.

I’m sorry. Love Island ending has really hit me hard.

See you in a month!

Maple Street Salary Reveal

After the BBC made the decision to reveal the salaries of its top earners, it has become clear that there is an appetite amongst the general public for greater transparency from their media and content providers.

In light of this, Maple Street have opted to follow suit and reveal how much we earn, in the hopes of building greater trust between ourselves and our clients.

All salaries are correct at the time of publishing

neil

Creative Director - Neil Cowling

Neil earns a salary of £1.5 million, though he insists on being paid exclusively in Francs, the extinct French currency, so his actual take home pay, after tax, is £0.

sara

Head of Production - Sara Hashem

Sara works on the basis that we keep her identity secret and continue to aid her flight from justice.

nic

Senior Creative -Nicki Marinovic

Nicki is in fact the ghost of a small Serbian child, and earns revenge rather than money.

kat

Content Producer - Katherine Kerr

Katherine works on a day rate – meaning she is paid in days. For every week she works, we extend her life by a day. Kat is 134 and will never die.

julia

New Business Manager - Julia Vethakkan

As our newest recruit, Julia is still on probation and is therefore is not paid an actual salary – we simply provide her with food, water and a small piece of tarpaulin she can use as shelter during rainy nights.

spalds

Creative Writer - Rich Spalding

Rich earns £nowherenearenough – his salary is surprisingly low, considering his talent, his good looks and the amount of joy he brings us on a day to day basis, both personally and professionally. He is well overdue a pay-rise and is absolutely not using this as a passive aggressive method of asking for one. But do please get #getrichapayrise trending. Thanks.

lou

Executive Producer - Louise Mulroy

Louise shits gold and has no need for actual money.

laura

Assistant Content Producer - Laura Gallop

Laura is paid in weapons.

There are two major conclusions to take from this –

As at the BBC, there is a clear and present equality issue at Maple Street. 75% of our top earning staff are women, only 25% men. It’s a problem we are very proud to have and are doing absolutely nothing to rectify.

None of us actually take home a penny – so please, please keep doing business with us. Our families are very hungry.

That is all. Thank you.  

Everything JUNE-eed to Know…

Oh. Hi…

politics

Didn’t see you there.

How’ve you been? Yeah, it has been a while. How am I? Oh, you know, same old same old. Yeah, still writing the newsletter. Yes it is very fulfilling, thank you.

Anyway, best get on with this.

What a month it’s been, dear readers. At the start of June, against all the odds, we found a way to make our country even less stable. An honestly remarkable achievement in the current climate, and one that raises the stakes for any other nation hoping to play at destabilisation in the coming weeks. Your move, America.

We’ve put together a handy (read: silly) guide to politics that you can hear, here.

But anyway, look at me blabbering on. How have you been?

Great. We should catch up properly sometime. I never stopped loving you.

 

This was our June.

 

23 & Me

Because you can never be sure, can you. OK, people kept telling you she ‘looks just like you’, but you didn’t see it. I mean, how could you? She was a baby, she looked like every baby. Like a faraway Ian Hislop. And sure, yes, the timings add up, and she takes after you. But there’s still that doubt…that little niggle of uncertainty late at night. Because she’s ginger and so is the milkman.

What I’m saying is, for Father’s Day, why not get your dad a DNA test? That was (sort of, but not really) the message behind our campaign for 23 & Me. These ads delve into the fascinating world of genetics. We love these ads. Have a listen!

 

Honestly, We Hate to Boast, We Really Do, But…

…bloody constant flow of celebs this month. I feel like I’ve been knocked out in a cartoon - because I’m seeing stars. I feel like an astrologer, because I’m – well, same joke that, no need to repeat it. Basically, it’s been a star studded month. I feel like an astronaut because I’m always surrounded by – yeah, you get it.

HEAD OF PROD Sara and NEW hubby mart

HEAD OF PROD Sara and NEW hubby mart

We had the genuine honour of producing radio commercials for the Red Cross this month. Their appeal for support in the wake of the recent tragedies in Manchester and London were voiced by Martin Freeman, and ran across Bauer and Wireless Group stations.

For the last few weeks we’ve been hosting radio royalty. Kyle Sandilands (about two-thirds of KIIS FM’s Kyle and Jackie-O), has been coming into our studios, under the cover of darkness, and broadcasting to the whole of Australia - every evening! Once voted Australia’s most-hated celebrity (though recently beaten to the top spot by Rolf Harris…genuinely), Kyle’s shows have been typically raucous and non-PC. The biggest challenge was turning him upside down so he felt at home while broadcasting, but we managed it with a series of winches and pulleys, and it was very worth it.

 

ITV

Sorry gang, but the celeb fest boast-a-thon isn’t over yet! Not only did we produce the commercials for ITV’s Ascot coverage, we had them voiced by none other than the Captain of the Titanic! And he didn’t propel us all to an icy grave!

Also known as Bernard Hill (or the King of Rohan from Lord of the Rings if you’re a nerd), he did a typically spell-binding turn and raised the commercial a whole new level. Have a listen to him here!

 

A Spokesman Said

You’ve gotta fight…DUN-DUN…for your rights…DUN-DUN-DUN…to consume energy and insure your house/car at a fair price.

It’s not as catchy as the Beastie Boys original, but there’s a certain ring. We’ve made a couple of ads for A Spokesman Said who, despite their baffling company name, are a price comparison website that “fight for consumer rights”. We took that very literally, and made a number of ads for them themed around physical violence (kind of). Have a listen here. 

 

We Need Good People. Hire Our Studio. Please.

Want to follow in the footsteps of Bernard Hill, Roger Daltrey and Hugh Bonneville? Then you, like them, could use our studios! And who knows, maybe you’ll appear here in this very newsletter! From adverts, to podcasts to, who knows, your own ground-breaking rap fusion album – record in top class facilities with top class producers and a fully working fridge.

 

gybo

 

Get your briefs out!

Send us through your most troublesome brief and we’ll help you make it into an audio masterpiece.

No obligation - just to show you what we can do.

Is it too visual for radio? Is it a rubbish product? Is it tricky?
Is it something you wish would just go away?

Whatever the reason, hand it over and let us make it shine.  Send your tricky briefs through to us at 

production@maplestreetcreative.co.uk.

 

And that’s what we’ve been up to in June.

Why not let us know what you’ve been doing with your month? We’d love to read it! (Please note that due to the high volume of fan mail we receive we will be unable to read or reply to individual correspondences, though they are, of course, appreciated).

And all that’s left is for me to thank everyone who made this possible. Thank you to my mother for always believing in me, my friends and family for their constant support and belief. And last, but not least, thanks to you, dear reader. My still point in a turning world. My only true friend.

This has all gone to my head.

 

Goodbye.

Brand Safety Doesn’t Concern Me

Confesses Neil, our Creative Development Director. A blog originally written for the IAB.

I know it’s a hot topic at the moment, but it doesn’t worry me now and it probably won’t worry me in the future.

Why not? Because I work in audio advertising.

That’s not to say I don’t care about it - I do, but working in audio and worrying about brand safety is like living in London and worrying about volcano eruptions. Scary, and not nice for the people affected, but we can be grateful that it doesn’t directly affect us.

IAB

I’m not trying to be smug, but brand safety is less of an issue because planned digital audios ad largely run on:

a)The digital stream of a broadcast radio station
b)A music streaming platform like Spotify or Deezer
c)A podcast platform against a set vertical on an approved whitelist

Programmatic is making its way to audio and is currently used on Spotify, and via DAX, and with “A Million Ads” technology, the creative can even be dynamic. The creative possibilities of this are what drive audio nerds like me to be super excited about the next few years, as what used to be purely “radio” advertising moves closer and closer to matching the personalisation levels offered by digital media.

Radio stations, streaming services, and podcast platforms all have full control over their content. If you want to buy programmatically you can rest assured that the content’s been approved, or if you want more control, than advertisers can choose the precise music genre, podcast series, or radio stations to advertise on.

So, for those of us in audio, the term “brand safety” can still be used, but in lower-case letters, with a soft, creative emphasis. It’s about making sure that the client chooses the PERFECT environment for their brand: Do the subtleties of the brand’s tone of voice fit seamlessly with the platform, the radio station or the associated content? Are they speaking as effectively as possible to the perfect audience, not just a good one? 

There’s still some risk that, for instance, an ad for walk-in baths could appear next to some hard-core hip-hop, but the platforms and agencies, like Radioworks, should work together to make sure the plans and the algorithms guard against that scenario. 

Audio is an intimate, infinite blank canvas, speaking to people in unique, personal moments. So if you’re dreaming of a brilliant, creative, adored medium that gives you a break from worrying about brand safety, just close your eyes and open your ears. You’ll find it’s right here.


Read more here

Maple Street News - It’s May-Ple Street!

Summer is here and we already don’t want it. People are taking their tops off in parks, wasps are back to ruin everyone’s good vibes, and we’re sweaty.

We’re all sweaty. I don’t remember what it was like to be dry.

Fortunately, it’ll only last about a week. HAHA. British humour, eh? We bloody love talking about the weather.

One deadly serious point before we go on, however – no man looks good in shorts. It needs saying, as a public service. There is not a man in the world who can get away with shorts in a non-sporting capacity. And I say this not as a critic, but as a man who cannot get away with shorts. For all our sakes, men, please, stick to trousers. Go for light trousers if you must. If you’re about to question whether that includes ¾ lengths then, no, obviously, they are the worst of them all. The key message here, lads, is that, as recompense for all the privilege being male affords you, you must now have sweaty legs for the next few months. I’m sorry. Please deal with this quietly.

Here is what we’ve been up to. 

 

D&AD Awards

THE BEST ADVERTS IN THE WORLD is how they are billed – and they’ve just been announced. Sadly, our work isn’t on the list, but that may be partly down to the fact that we didn’t enter (can’t lose if you don’t try – smart) – but the people who did win are well worth listening to. Here is a link,so relax, maybe have a bath, light some candles, chuck in some bubbles - and treat yourself to the very best of radio advertising. What an afternoon.

dad

 

Bravissimo

I can be mature about this.

bravissimo

We’re doing adverts for bras. Fine. That’s absolutely fine. Honestly, I think of this client like I would any client. It’s actually kind of boring to me, now, thinking about it. It’s on a level with, I dunno, MOTs. It’s just bras, guys, get over it. Can we all be grown-ups now please?

We’re doing adverts for bras. The ads are great, as are the bras. Listen here.

 

 

RAJAR

Good news, stats fans! Last week the latest RAJAR came out.

Like any normal person, you’ll probably have pored over it in the kind of detail you normally reserve for this newsletter, but for anyone who hasn’t yet, here are the extremely edited down highlights…

capital

CAPITAL ARE BACK TO NUMBER ONE – in London, at least.

DIGITAL RADIO’S LISTENING SHARE REACHES 47.2% - which is significant, because it’s close to the 50% mark, and the 50% mark is the point at which the government will start to consider switching off FM and essentially banning old people from listening to the radio.

COMMERCIAL RADIO BACK IN FRONT OF BBC – with 34.5 million listening hours a week. Take THAT, public ownership!

 

Barnet and Southgate College

teens

Are you a trendy cool young teen who recently completed their GCSEs? If so, this e-mail newsletter almost certainly shouldn’t have reached you. We’re sorry, we’ve made an error. However, while you’re here, listen to this ad we made for Barnet and Southgate College helping #teens work out what to do with their lives. It’s one of two, and we think they both sound great!

 

In the meantime, what are you doing with your June? Voting in the election, most likely. We’ve all gotta vote these days. It’s not the past anymore, where some of us weren’t allowed. No. Now we all can, so we all must. See you in a school hall on June the 8th. LET’S TURN THIS COUNTRY ROUND!