Remember, Remember also Rhymes with September

September is over, we’re all back at school, summer is but a long forgotten dream. Ah, those heady days, when it was too hot and yet also rained heavily almost all of the time. Soon you won’t be able to go outside without a jumper because you’ll die.

Let’s face it; September is one of the bad months. Good riddance. No wonder that guy from Green Day sleeps through it every year. What good comes in September? A cursory glance at the national days we’ve had in September makes for grim viewing.

September 2nd – Victory Over Japan Day – That’ll be in America then. Seems unnecessary to rub it in like that. You don’t have to name who you beat. Just call it Victory Day. Or y’know, stop mentioning it. That’s more polite.

September 19th – International Talk Like a Pirate Day ­– an absolute bull***t day for children. A day that devalues the whole concept of ‘National Days’. A day for virgins.

September 28th - World Rabies Day – Well, that one’s a curveball. And it’s today. Hope you’re celebrating, guys, by…I dunno. Staying clear of foamy dogs?

Anyway, point proven. September sucks. Here’s how we spent this terrible month.

Historic England

Did you know, in the past, they didn’t have podcasts? I know, right? Mad! If they wanted entertainment on the way to work they had to trick a crow into dancing for them. That was literally all they had, back there in the past.

Fortunately, we now have podcasts – and, soon, we’ll have one more. Our sisters at Fresh Air are producing a fantastic new podcast in partnership with Historic England.

It’s a chance to explore England’s history through its most spectacular landmarks – it’s a huge project that will be fantastic when it’s ready. There’s a trailer here. In the meantime, I’d recommend not listening to anything else, just because.

Minoli Tiles

Tiles? Where would be without them? Well, firstly, we’d all have very wet carpets in our bathrooms. Secondly, we wouldn’t have anything to go out on. And thirdly, Scrabble would be a challenge.

We need tiles. And if you’re going to get tiles, you might as well get quality tiles. And if you’re going to get quality tiles, there’s only one place to go. Minoli Tiles. Of course. Here’s a nice bit of creative we did for Minoli Tiles.

Bath Spa University

Another month, another university. I know last month we were all ‘You should go to Staffordshire University’ but, friends, we were mistaken. You should actually go to Bath Spa University. That’s where it’s at!

You love a bath! You love a spa! And you need to go to university, because how else are you going to spend that random 30 grand you’ve got lying around? 

If that’s not enough, listen to this. Advert. We made. For Bath Spa Uni.

Sky Store

Here at Maple Street, we’re all about helping up and comers. Start-ups, small businesses – anyone who could do with a helping hand to get on their way in the business world. And it’s that kind of charitable spirit that led us to work with Sky, this month, on their latest Sky Store ad.

If you’ve not heard of Sky, they’re a small telecommunications company and Sky Store is a, like…a sort of online video shop, if that makes any sense? It’s in your TV, and it has, I assume, a few video cartridges already installed, and then you can choose the one you want to watch without having to get it out of the box and put it in the slot. Will it catch on? No, probably not. But we did our best. Listen here.

Be Our Guest, Be Our Guest…

We’ve got some great studios here for hiring – and sometimes those studios are hired by people you’ll have seen on telly.

They come in and they’re nice, and they sort of act like they’re like us. But deep down they’re not. They’re better than us. Wealthier, healthier, more attractive. Leading more meaningful lives. Getting up earlier. Running more. And working harder. They are better than us, and they rub it in our faces because they know it hurts.

We hate them.

This month we’ve been lucky enough to hate loads of great people, thanks to Giovanna Fletcher and Pixiu, who are recording Giovanna’s podcast Happy Mum, Happy Baby. Giovanna is an accomplished actor, writer, and vlogger – and is also married to at least one member of McFly. She keeps bringing in notable mums and interviewing them. Notable mums thus far include Fearne Cotton, Jo Elvin and two of the mums from the Saturdays. It’s a great podcast, well worth a listen. You can find it here.

She’s not had my Mum on yet though, which feels like a snub. My mum is lovely. Don’t get why Giovanna hates her so much.

We Need Good People. Hire Our Studio. Please.

Want to follow in the footsteps of Giovanna Fletcher, Fearne Cotton and (potentially) my mum? Then you, like them, could use our studios! And who knows, maybe you’ll appear here in this very newsletter! From adverts, to podcasts to, who knows, your own ground-breaking rap fusion album – record in top class facilities with top class producers and a fully working fridge.

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Well, we’ve got there in the end

This month, I’ll be honest, it’s felt like a struggle to write this. I’m sure it’s been quite a difficult read for you too.

It’s because, you know…September is dull. It’s just such a dull month. And yet it has the audacity to have more letters in it than any other month. Arrogant.

I honestly couldn’t hate September more. Pointless, pointless month.

Let’s meet up again in October. Yes, October – now there’s a month! It’s got Hallowe’en, with its witch hats and pumpkins and honestly ludicrous apostrophe placement. And also National Cat Day on the 29th. What a great month.

See you then.